Encouraging Others: Soccer Lessons 6

"A little Encouragement goes a long way."

   One time when I was playing soccer in college our team was really struggling. People were angry with one another because people were yelling at other people on the field. It got very bad and our captains called a meeting. One of the captains said, "how many of you don't like to be encouraged?" No one raised her hand. Then we discussed how we like to be encouraged specifically. Some people needed to be demanded to do things on the field. Others would rather be talked to one on one. However, no one said they wanted criticism all the time.

   Playing a sport isn't easy especially if you are losing or in an intense match. Many times people have yelled things at me that didn't make me want to play harder for them. I still did my best but at the end of the game it just made me feel bad even if we won. Other times I've had people encourage me on the field and I feel like I could play forever if I needed to. One compliment can make someone's day.

   In the world it is very difficult for some people to encourage others. All it takes is a few words to make or break someone's day. You choose if you are going to make or break someone's day. Many people are unhappy with their work because of what people have said or done. I have been the most comfortable at my job when I've had people who support and uplift me. These people go out of their way to ask me how my day is going. They try to encourage me.

   What would happen if, instead of being negative all the time, we tried at least once a day to encourage someone? What would the world be like? I'm not saying to sugarcoat things. I'm saying to look for little things you can do to make someone's day better.

   So, do you try to encourage others? What can you do to encourage someone today?

   1 Thessalonians 5:11
   Image from here.

Before You Say Something: Soccer Lessons

"Before you say something think: is it helpful, is it necessary, is it said in love?"

   As previously mentioned soccer is a grueling sport. But, to make matters worse in High school you could have 19+ games in 2 months. Those games are not typically spread out either. One year we played a game Friday, Saturday, had off Sunday, then played Monday and Tuesday. Needless to say the girls were exhausted. Then when you are not playing in games you have practice every weekday you don't have a game. That's a lot of time with the same people. If you get along with each other that's great... If you don't get along with each other well let's just say things don't go so well at the end of the season.

   Many times when the players are tired and things aren't going well things are said in anger that those people may not mean. Or, they may not think about. I remember countless games where tensions were him and people screamed at me. Do you think that helped me at all? Do you think I was listening to their message? Do you think that encouraged me to play harder? No, it really didn't it just made me feel worse about myself.

   This is where this saying stemmed from: "Before you say something think: is it Helpful, is it Necessary, is it said in love?" In the heat of the moment people say things they may not mean to say. But, like a tube of toothpaste, once you say something you can't take it back. You can apologize, and many people do after the game, but the damage is done.

That's why we need to stop in the moment and think. Is what I'm about to say helpful? Will this help this person improve their game? Can this help my team? Will this help this person improve overall? If you are going to say something to someone you work with will it be helpful for them or will it hurt them?

   Next we need to think is this necessary? Do I need to say this? Is this pressing to say right now or should I wait to see what happens or get more information?

   Finally, if you get past these first two stipulations, you have a responsibility to say what you say in love. Think about a time where someone came to tell you something good that would've or did help you improve; but the way the person said it made you not want to do what the person said. Did you listen to them or did you get defensive? If you don't say what you feel you need to say in love, then that person may never improve and you will have lost a relationship.

   Galatians 6:1 says: "Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted." Did you catch that? You should restore that person in a spirit of gentleness. That means in a  spirit of love. Rather than saying "that presentation was horrible Jim. Why did you decide to present it that way?" You could say, "Jim that was an interesting presentation. Maybe next time you could try to look at everyone as you are talking. If you want help on the next presentation or any more suggestions I would be happy to help." Do you see the difference?

   So, do you think before you speak? If you don't what can you do in order to do a better job of correcting someone in the right way? How can you show someone you love them today?

   Image from here.

Your Last is Your Best: Soccer Lessons

"Your last one is your best one."

   Soccer is a very grueling sport. Some people who don't know soccer or have never seen it played just assume that soccer is just passing the ball up the field to score. Yes, the goal of the game is to score in the goal but there is so much more strategy to it. What formation are you going to play? Where are you going to play certain players? Should you contain or step hard to the ball? Should you pass or shoot? There's more but I'll stop there.

   One area that I have noticed that is very difficult about the game of soccer is the endurance it takes to stay in the game. I'm not talking just running endurance. I'm talking body endurance too. For those of you who don't know, soccer is a contact sport. Players need to take hits, some harder than others, and still play the game. The only protection players wear are shin guards. Thus, they get the wind knocked out of them a lot.

   All of these things are the reason I began to say: "your last one is your best one." This may seem strange. You may be thinking, "wouldn't you want your first to be your best?" Yes, you still want your first to be good but that's when you aren't so tired. I've coached teams and been on teams that were doing well at the beginning because they were not tired. Then they got tired and lost. If you don't do your best through the whole game it doesn't matter how you do at the beginning of the game. No one remembers about how you did at the beginning. It matters how you do at the end. The result tells a story.

   It's like this: when you first start a job you want to prove yourself so you work really hard. Then as you are there longer you may get tired of the trivial everyday tasks you do. If you start to slack off on your duties what's going to happen? Do you think people are going to remember you for what you did when you first started working there or how you worked when you were there your last days?

   Colossians 3:23 says: "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men." If we are working for the Lord then we should give our best all the time. Will our best be different on different days? Probably, I mean if you are sick your best may only be working as hard as you can even though your body is yelling at you. Nonetheless, we should still give our best even if we are tired. Like I said before, people probably won't remember how you started something but how you finished it.

   1 Corinthians 9:24 says: "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize." This verse brings home my message. If you run really hard at the beginning of the race but don't do your best at the end you won't get the prize. That's why your last one has to be your best. Because, when you think to yourself, "oh I've worked so hard. I'll just slack off this one time" that one time could cost you a lot.

   So, do you work hard to do your best every day? Are you running the race to win the prize? What area of your life do you feel you need to work harder for God's glory?

   Image from here.

Joy in Working: Labor Day

   It is Labor Day, a day that we think about not working. But, I'm going to rain on your parade and talk about work. I am a teacher and a coach. Therefore, I hear a lot of complains about work whether that be from co-workers, students, or players. Why do I hear so many complaints? Should I hear so many complaints?
   Way back, at the beginning of time and the creation of the universe, God made everything and it was good (Genesis 1). God is smart and caring. He did not create anything that did not serve a purpose in the universe or on earth. He created Adam to have dominion over all the earth. In Genesis 2:15 we read why Adam was put in the Garden: "The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it."
   Hold up, Adam had to work before the fall? Yes, and since God created everything and said that "it was good" then that means work is good. We don't read much about Adam working in the Garden before the fall but we do know that he named the animals, which was a job God gave him. Do you think Adam complained about it? No, Adam was happy to be given a purpose/job. He got to be a leader on earth and walk with the ultimate leader/boss.
   What happened? How did we get from being joyful in our work to complaining? The answer is the fall, and sin. Work suddenly got really difficult because Adam and Eve chose to disobey God. Genesis 3:17-19 says: "Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return.”
   Thus, we began to have hard work. That is why we complain about work. It is hard and it hurts our bodies. Yet, God created it to be good. When children grow up what do they do? They get a job. Even when children are little they work by doing chores or finding odd jobs to make money. Work is to be a good thing. Should we complain about doing work? No, because God created it to be good. 

   So, do you complain too much about work? What can you do to find joy in work?

   Image from here. 

Don't Give Up: Soccer Lessons 3

"It's hard to beat a person who never gives up" (Babe Ruth).

   In soccer it is very easy to feel defeated when you lose. As a JV coach it is also very easy to feel defeated in general. Many times I will get players who have never played soccer. Many times I will have less players than the other team so my girls will be more tired. Many times when there is a sliver of hope, because I have had a player improve so much, that player gets moved up to varsity and I have to find a new player for their position. Don't get me wrong, I love being a JV coach because I get to help build my player's foundations in soccer and see them grow. But, it's not easy at times.

   Over the years I looked at my JV team and I had to figure out a way to keep their spirits up. That's when I began using the quote: "It's hard to beat a person who never gives up" (Babe Ruth). Will we lose games? Yes. Will we play bad at times? Yes. But, we are never truly defeated unless we give up. If we give up in a game we are giving up on ourselves. We are giving up on the lessons we learn in that game. We are giving up on improving during that game which can make us better. On top of that, if you give up in a game, you will not have any chance of winning that game.

   In life, it is hard to not feel tempted to give up at times, especially if we get sukkerpunched with a lot of things at once. Maybe you have problems with a co-worker who just won't get off your back, maybe a friend is angry at you, maybe your child isn't doing well at school, maybe your family member is sick, or maybe because of many things you are beginning to lose your faith.

   Once again, you have a choice: you could give up or you could keep going on and keep fighting. It may be easier to give up but will giving up help you grow? Will giving up feel good? Probably not, which is why we have to keep fighting no matter how hard it is. Yes, you can start to feel down. You can vent to people. You can have a good cry. But, don't let any of those things impact you to the point where you feel it's okay to give up. If you choose to give up you are just defeating yourself.

   Galatians 6:9 says: "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." If we give up we will not reap the harvest. Your harvest may be different than someone else's on earth. But, true Christians are all working toward the same harvest: heaven. If we give up we are not giving God our best and others may not see Christ in you. That's why we can never give up.

   So, do you tend to give up when things get too hard? What can you do to stop yourself from giving up? How can you lean on God in order to not give up?
   Image from here. 

How Good Do You Want to Be? Soccer Lessons

"Its not how good you are it's how good you want to be" (Paul Arden).

   The first quote I ever used as a season quote for my team was: "Its not how good you are it's how good you want to be" (Paul Arden). This quote is all about effort and growth. At first, my girls did not understand it but by the end of the season they heard it loud and clear.

   Sometimes it is hard to push yourself. You may have been doing the same thing for so long you don't feel like doing it anymore; or, doing it to the best of your ability. You may be feeling sick and not up to doing your best. Or, you could just be exhausted and not feel like doing anything.

   During our 2 month season the girls faced a lot of these things. It is taxing on the body to play soccer 5-6 days a week for 2 months. The girls got tired and sick. I told them that they just needed to do their best on that day to improve. If they gave anything less than their best they were not only hurting themselves but their team.

   The girls knew to work hard to become better every day. I have had some girls on my teams stay after practice to ask me what they can do to improve. Or, they would take it upon themselves to practice by themselves after practice. These girls were following the quote.

   In life, we have choices every day. We can choose to work hard to get better every day or we can stay stagnant. If your goal in life is to become CEO of a company but you don't put the work in to become smarter in the jobs in that company then you probably won't become a CEO. If your goal in life is to be the best parent you can be but you don't spend time with your own child you won't be the best parent you can be.

   We must take steps to become the best we can be. That means working hard no matter what. That means growing in knowledge of what we want to be the best in. That means caring about those around us because if we get better we can make others better.

   This quote also embodies what God calls us to do. In Colossians 3:23-24 it says: "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ." We are called to do our best, not just to improve ourselves and others, because God calls us to do our best for him. If you are folding laundry you aren't just doing it for yourself or you family, you are folding laundry for God. If you are working on a big project you aren't just doing that for yourself or you co-workers, you are doing that project for God. God wants our best. If we don't give it we won't grow in him.

   So, are you choosing to stay stagnant because you are not giving your best? How good do you want to be? Are you giving your best to God?

   Image from here.

Soccer Lessons Series

   In life you learn a lot of lessons. Those lessons come in different ways but they all help you grow if you let them. One way I learned many of my lessons in life was through sports. I particularly learned many lessons through the sport of soccer. Now, I am blessed to coach soccer and teach the lessons I learned to players as well.

   When I first started coaching I knew I learned lessons from soccer but I was still figuring out my coaching style. I was focused on teaching soccer skills. Some of you may be saying "isn't that what a soccer coach is to do? Aren't you supposed to teach your players how to play soccer? "The answer is yes, I am to teach my players how to play soccer. But, I would like you to think about how many players who play when they are young actually go on to play soccer in college or higher. There are not that many. What is the point of high school sports then? Some would say to have fun. Others would say for social skills. Both of those are true. As a coach I take it one step further. I believe sports teach valuable lessons.

   I knew that's what I believed but it wasn't until the head coach that I worked with said this that I truly put it together in my head: "high school soccer isn't necessarily about soccer. It's about the life lessons." The lessons players learn in high school sports go with them in life. I feel that those lessons are worth remembering. If you are still in High school, in college, or you've been out of school for a long time I feel that it is time for a reminder. That's why I am beginning a series on the lessons I've learned and that I teach to my players. Each lesson I teach in soccer applies to life. I ask you to come on this journey with me and maybe you'll learn, or relearn, some lessons along the way.

   2 Peter 3:18 and Hebrews 6:1

   Image from here.